OpenIDEO is an open innovation platform. Join our global community to solve big challenges for social good. Sign Up / Login or Learn more

a DADDY on the loose

A funny and tender tale about a child's search for her father

Photo of shoba Dewey

Written by

Somewhere in the city is a Daddy on the loose.

He looks like this…

Shiny head

Stripy legs

Pointy nose

Curly moustache

 

A daddy like that is hard to miss.

If you do chance upon him, BEWARE!


This Daddy sneaks behind…

And TICKLES you in places that makes you squeal.


This Daddy lifts you up in the air…

And ZOOMS you away in a jet plane – half way round the world.


Don’t you ever ride on his back...

Because he GALLOPS you to places so far - you'll reach the moon.


Erin’s out on the search to find this Daddy.

Can you help? (illustration note: Mom and Erin catches the bus)

Remember…

Shiny head

Stripy legs

Pointy nose

Curly moustache.

Shout DADDY when you see it.


Is he on the bus? 

Erin spies lots of heads.

Black, brown, blue, green, yellow, red, and…

(illustration note: Mom carries Erin and stands in the back of the bus, where there’s a full view of heads with different hair color, different head covering such as caps, hats, veil and 1 bald head)

Shiny head…do you see it?

DADDY!

But he’s not.


Is he in the store? 

Erin spies lots of legs. (illustration note: Erin walks holding Mom’s hand. )

Spotty, dotty, flowery, spotty-flowery, dotty-flowery and…

Stripy legs…do you see it?

DADDY!

But she’s not. (illustration note: a lady in striped pants)

 

Is he in the park?

Erin spies lots of Daddies.  (illustration note: Daddies on benches reading newspapers)

A nose peeps out as she walks past.

Pointy nose…do you see it?

DADDY!

But he’s not.


Erin does not cry. She’s tough just like you.

But it is almost nap time.

Where is this Daddy?

Her eyes feel heavy and soon they close. (illustration note: Erin in Mom’s arms asleep as they walk down the road)


A soft tickle on her face wakes her.

Strong hands pick her up…

and hug her close.

Curly moustache…do you see it?

DADDY!

It really is him.

Describe the intended vision for your early childhood book manuscript in 1-2 sentences

I envision this book to be funny, interactive and engaging for both the child and the caregiver. The illustrations play an important role in bringing forth the humor.

Share your suggested book title

a DADDY on the loose

PLEASE USE THE VERSION OF THIS QUESTION AT THE TOP OF THE SUBMISSION FORM: Share a draft of your manuscript (250 word limit, not including title).

Somewhere in the city is a Daddy on the loose. He looks like this… Shiny head Stripy legs Pointy nose Curly moustache A daddy like that is hard to miss. If you do chance upon him, BEWARE! This Daddy sneaks behind… And TICKLES you in places that makes you squeal. This Daddy lifts you up in the air… And ZOOMS you away in a jet plane – half way round the world. Don’t you ever ride on his back... Because he GALLOPS you to places so far - you'll reach the moon. Erin’s out on the search to find this Daddy. Can you help? (illustration note: Mom and Erin catches the bus) Remember… Shiny head Stripy legs Pointy nose Curly moustache. Shout DADDY when you see it. Is he on the bus? Erin spies lots of heads. Black, brown, blue, green, yellow, red, and… (illustration note: Mom carries Erin and stands in the back of the bus, where there’s a full view of heads with different hair color, different head covering such as caps, hats, veil and 1 bald head) Shiny head…do you see it? DADDY! But he’s not. Is he in the store? Erin spies lots of legs. (illustration note: Erin walks holding Mom’s hand. ) Spotty, dotty, flowery, spotty-flowery, dotty-flowery and… Stripy legs…do you see it? DADDY! But she’s not. (illustration note: a lady in striped pants) Is he in the park? Erin spies lots of Daddies. (illustration note: Daddies on benches reading newspapers) A nose peeps out as she walks past. Pointy nose…do you see it? DADDY! But he’s not. Erin does not cry. She’s tough just like you. But it is almost nap time. Where is this Daddy? Her eyes feel heavy and soon they close. (illustration note: Erin in Mom’s arms asleep as they walk down the road) A soft tickle on her face wakes her. Strong hands pick her up… and hug her close. Curly moustache…do you see it? DADDY! It really is him.

How has this book been informed by early childhood language development research and evidence? (response minimum 250 Characters)

I have used simple words that young children are familiar with (most Tier 1 words). Some words have been highlighted for caregivers to read them with expression and by changing the tone of voice to evoke humor or action. There’s also predictability through repetitions of phrases that will encourage the child’s participation. Caregivers have the flexibility to introduce colors and patterns through the text and illustration.

Please describe any familiarity you may have with Philadelphia and its residents? (optional question)

none except from your resources. I have made frequent visits to the US, but I have never lived there.

How have you crafted this manuscript to resonate with and/or reflect the experiences of those living in urban contexts? (optional question)

The topic of the story - attachment between a child and her father - is universal and would resonate with any child in any country with a male figure in the family. So also are the elements of the story, such as the bus, the store, the park are all universal aspects of any urban city in the world.

Location: Country

Indonesia

Location: State or Department

Jakarta

Location: City

Jakarta

Tell us more about you / your team

Shoba is currently a freelance consultant for early childhood education. She has over 15 years of experience with child-centered curriculum and practices. As a consultant, she has worked with the Directorate General of Early Childhood Education on several occasions preparing and reviewing teaching manuals. Shoba is also passionate about writing. Her books on early childhood education has been published locally. She also collaborates with non-profit organizations such as 'Room To Read' to create children’s books that are made accessible to children all over Indonesia.

Multiple Choice - Have you been previously published (online, self-published, and print included)?

  • Yes

If yes, please list titles and publications.

"I can do it" a Room to Read publication for distribution in Indonesia. “Janggan Dragon Kite" is a picture book that was long listed for the Scholastic Picture Book Award, 2015, currently being processed for publication by Scholastic Asia.

Do you have an agent?

  • No

How did you hear about the Challenge? (optional question)

  • OpenIDEO announcement email

What best describes you? (optional question)

  • I am/we are creatives, writers, or artists

14 comments

Join the conversation:

Comment
Spam
Photo of Itika Gupta
Team

Hi shoba Dewey  Welcome to the Challenge Community!
It truly is a tender tale of child and his/her amazing daddy.
How might you evolve your manuscript to introduce new nudges of engagement and interaction for caregivers, to help them with their child’s learning development as they narrate the story? You can find some inspiration in the Final Toolkit and Challenge Resources listed on the challenge page

Spam
Photo of shoba Dewey
Team

Thank you, Itika, for your feedback. I'll try to make revisions in whatever little time there's left before the deadline.

Spam
Photo of xin li
Team

I love the narrative of this story, especially part the child is searching for Dad in the city. It must be very fun for an illustrator to work on this story. I saw some discussions regarding the universalness of the story (not all children have a prominent male role model in their life). It is a hard one to fix. Maybe there is no fix for this story. But the limitation does not stop this story being wonderful. I hope this manuscript will become a book and I get a chance to read it to my child one day.

Spam
Photo of shoba Dewey
Team

Thanks so much, Xin Li, for your kind comments. Really appreciate it.

Spam
Photo of Ashanti Antonio Prescott
Team

Catching Daddy, good description and nice setting.

Spam
Photo of shoba Dewey
Team

Thanks so much for your comment.

Spam
Photo of Ashanti Antonio Prescott
Team

You are welcome

Spam
Photo of Dawnnbooks .
Team

This is such a strong piece.
How would a child with no male role model (much less a father) deal with this?
There is no easy answer I know but I felt I should red flag it as I have seen the moderator ask a similar question to many of us.

Spam
Photo of Fatima El-Mekki
Team

I agree with Dawnnbooks that this is a strong piece.
This part "Don’t you ever ride on his back...

Because he GALLOPS you to faraway places. You’ll never come home." Makes me kinda wonder. -you ride on his back....and you'll never come home?" I don't really feel comfortable with it. It's just my opinion. Good luck to you and all of us.

Spam
Photo of shoba Dewey
Team

The intent is to add humor to the story, but thanks for pointing out that it may have an opposite effect.

Spam
Photo of shoba Dewey
Team

Ah yes, it is about a child and her father. I see your point. Thanks Dawnbooks for your feedback.

Spam
Photo of Dawnnbooks .
Team

Typos are like weeds they never go away and no matter what you do there they are!!!!
>>But she’s not.<<
Should be >>he's<<
Good luck to us all.

Spam
Photo of shoba Dewey
Team

Hi, actually it's not a typo, it's meant to show a lady with stripy pants. Thanks for your feedback.

Spam
Photo of Dawnnbooks .
Team

Opps!!
Sorry.